Friends called me stingy for saving NYSC allowance to start business – Single mum

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Twenty-seven-year-old mother of two, Gladys Adija, who saved her National Youth Service Corps monthly allowance to start a foodstuffs business, tells ABDULLATEEF FOWEWE how she survived the service year

What are you doing for a living?

I garnered recognition as a resilient single mother, and I have faced numerous challenges in life. My journey commenced when I utilised the savings from my youth corps allowance to establish my own business. I engaged in selling, purchasing, and exporting perishable and non-perishable foodstuffs. However, in the year 2019, my path took an unexpected turn as my child’s health became a significant concern, leading to my relocation from Ekiti State to Plateau State to serve the nation. Being a native of Plateau State, and having been raised there, this transition brought about several changes in my life.

Initially, I harboured ambitious dreams of venturing into the acting profession, fuelled by aspirations to achieve greatness on the silver screen. However, the arrival of my child ushered me into a new phase of existence, diverting my attention towards providing for my little one’s needs and fulfilling financial obligations. The birth of my child served as a catalyst, permanently altering my perception of money. Before motherhood, I had never truly comprehended the value of financial resources, leading me to indulge in extravagant spending habits. Nevertheless, with the birth of my baby, my financial circumstances underwent a drastic transformation, limiting my access to money as I had once enjoyed.

During that challenging period where earning money became an arduous task, I developed an unwavering appreciation for the value of every penny. Faced with the responsibility of providing for my child, I resorted to selling tomatoes and peppers on the streets as a means to acquire the necessary resources. It was through this humble endeavour that my aspirations for sustainable success began to take shape, as I anticipated a brighter future for both myself and the generations to come. Undoubtedly, my beloved daughter stands as the driving force behind my determination and motivation.

 You previously mentioned that you relocated from Ekiti State to Plateau. Who were you residing with during that period?

During my stay in Plateau, I had the privilege of staying with a long-time acquaintance who resided near my primary assignment location. She happened to be working at a nearby establishment, which made it convenient for both of us. I approached her with the request to lodge at her place temporarily, and she graciously agreed to accommodate me.

How was your experience with the NYSC scheme?

By the end of my service year, I was able to save around N320,000. Despite only spending N8,000 of my monthly allowance and saving the rest, I still struggled to meet my friend’s standards of living. To make ends meet, I took on cleaning and washing jobs, as well as tutoring children for extra income. Though my friends mocked me for my frugal lifestyle at the time, I am grateful for where I am today. Nevertheless, while I was serving, my child was in the care of my parents. Therefore, my NYSC experience was not a pleasant one, which is why I always advise women to avoid engaging in premarital sex.

How did your friend react when you were unable to meet her standards?

At the end of each month, my mother would send me food supplies to sustain us. Additionally, I managed to have some income through a part-time job I held, the proceeds of which I used to purchase essential household items. I did my best to contribute within my means, while also ensuring my friend’s needs were met. However, as I began to realise that I was unable to participate in certain activities that required significant expenditures to save up, I started refraining from social gatherings. Whenever I received invitations to hang out, I would politely decline, stating that I had commitments such as attending Bible study or being preoccupied with other responsibilities. Consequently, I earned the nickname ‘stingy coco’ from some individuals who were unaware of my financial constraints, because most of them didn’t know that I was not stingy and that I was going with my plans.

Before becoming a mother, what was your primary source of income?

Coming from a modest family background, my father, though not affluent, displayed an unwavering commitment to meeting his children’s needs, particularly in the realm of education. During my time as a student, I enjoyed a comfortable life where I had access to all the necessary tools and facilities that made studying less stressful. I never found myself asking my classmates for financial assistance because my parents were always willing to go the extra mile to ensure my well-being in every possible way.

How many children do you have now?

I am proud to say that I am a single mother of two beautiful children. My first child is currently seven years old, while the second one is just six months old.

You sold tomatoes to feed yourself and your child; what about your husband, was he not showing enough sense of responsibility?

At that time, my children’s father was also a student and could only contribute minimally to our financial needs. Additionally, we were not legally married when we had our first child. We later had a traditional marriage in 2023. Unfortunately, it took us over eight years and two children before we realised that we were not compatible, so we decided to divorce.

How did your parents react when you got pregnant out of wedlock?

My parents’ reaction was typical of any parent in such a situation; they were very angry. My father, especially, had high hopes for my future because of my academic brilliance. He always boasted about me to his friends. When I got pregnant, my father was deeply disappointed, and he became somewhat reserved in the community. He feared that my future was at risk, as many young women in similar situations often abandon their education and face a bleak future. Despite their disappointment, my parents did not abandon me; instead, they were concerned about my future and supported me through that challenging time. I am grateful for my family’s unwavering support and will choose to be born into the same family if given another chance to come back.

After that, they motivated me to return to school, although my father wasn’t providing for me like he used to before and that was what made me work harder to care for myself and my child. However, my mother came and stayed with me in school throughout the time of my pregnancy to make sure I didn’t run into depression or be discouraged from going to lectures; she used to cook for me and wash my clothes; she did everything for me not to feel abandoned. She always told me that I should not allow any situation to define my end; she made me realise that the child I had out of wedlock shouldn’t be the end of my dream. So, I appreciate the efforts of my parents; they stood with me all through despite having an extra year in school due to the pregnancy.

Is there a point when you consider abortion of the pregnancy?

No. I had already made up my mind that I was going to keep the child without minding the consequences immediately after I knew I was pregnant. However, some of my schoolmates mocked me when I was pregnant but I didn’t give up because of my good friends who were always beside me to motivate me before the arrival of my mother. There was even a friend who used to take responsibility for anything that concerned me. So, instead of concentrating on those who were mocking me, I chose to pay attention to those who were always there for me because I am the kind of person who focuses on positivity rather than negativity.

Did people ridicule you for hawking pepper?

Yes, it was a lot because I was well-known in my community as a beautiful lady, and I had a lot of men who wanted to be my lover before I got pregnant, but I didn’t give them a chance to approach me, and I didn’t talk to them. So, when I started hawking pepper, it gave them a chance to point at me and mock me. Some even dared to say it to my face, leaving me feeling utterly humiliated. This period of my life was the most challenging. I knew I couldn’t stay where I was, feeling uncomfortable with how I was being judged by the community. It was one of the most devastating moments of my life but God made me understand that I won’t be in that situation forever and their mockery motivated me to do all I could do to get out of the situation.

What challenges do you encounter as a foodstuffs seller?

At 27 years old with two children, the responsibilities weigh heavily on me. Balancing customer service with childcare, and often having to carry a baby on my back while attending to business, has been quite demanding. It’s a stark realisation that individuals without children have more freedom to pursue their dreams without such distractions and responsibilities. However, I don’t dwell on these challenges too much as my children serve as my primary motivation.

How did you manage to overcome this hurdle?

My turning point came when I found solace in God. Realising that there were challenges beyond my control, I sought refuge in a church during a youth programme centred on relationships. It was there that I opened my heart and wept. The pastor and his wife noticed my distress and offered words of comfort, telling me that I didn’t have to carry the burden alone. They reassured me that by entrusting my pain to God, He would help me bear it until it faded away.

My backbone is God, and I have a journal where I express my thoughts and feelings. I write about my disappointments in myself and my parents. Recently, I found out that two of my siblings read my articles in the journal and left a message saying they were proud of me. However, the journal reminded me of my journey and how I overcame challenges. Moreover, one of the things I wrote in my journal was about single mothers not letting society define their worth. I also emphasised the importance of not letting outsiders judge or define your journey and struggles. I remember writing about how girls who miss out on opportunities early on are looked down upon, while men are free to marry whoever they choose. My own experience has taught me the importance of abstaining from premarital sex.

How did you manage to start a business with the money you saved when you were serving?

I rented a shop but had little money left over. I began by selling essential items and in-demand grains, purchasing them in smaller quantities due to limited funds. I had to replenish my stock frequently by visiting the market five times a week. Instead of spending my profits, I reinvested them in products that were in high demand. This cycle eventually led to the success of my business.

How would you assess your current state of personal development and progress?

When reflecting upon my growth journey, three phrases aptly capture the essence of my current state: the decision to do more, the unwavering determination to succeed, and the relentless pursuit of becoming something more, someone extraordinary. The concept of sacrifice permeates my growth story. I have made countless sacrifices along the way to reach the point where I stand today. For instance, just last year, I could not afford luxuries like getting my hair styled professionally; instead, I had to learn to take care of my hair. By willingly depriving myself of certain indulgences and focusing on essential priorities, I have been able to reach the position I currently find myself in.

What advice will you offer to single mothers?

One valuable piece of advice that I consistently share with those in my circle is that when you approach your endeavours with a pure heart and pure intentions, the rewards bestowed upon you by a higher power are boundless. While I acknowledge that it isn’t solely my sacrifices that have propelled me to my present state, I take great care to manage even the limited resources I possess with wisdom and prudence. I approach my work with dedication as if I were embarking on a professional office job. I handle every task diligently, maintaining a high level of integrity, and never feeling ashamed of the work I do. By intertwining my unwavering commitment to excellence with ethical conduct, I have been able to make steady progress in my journey toward success. If you act with integrity and a pure heart, you will not be someone who exploits others or seeks excessive profits. If you are this type of person, God will surely reward your efforts with success.

Where do you envision your business in the future?

My plans for my business are ambitious. While some may think I have already achieved success, I know I have only scratched the surface of what I envisioned. My goal is to become a dominant force in Nigeria and internationally, surpassing even (Aliko) Dangote. I also aim to establish international partnerships to export food products from my resource-rich region. I believe that with proper government support, agriculture in the North can significantly boost the country’s financial strength and resources.

What are your plans for the future regarding your agricultural work?

I intend to delve deeper into agriculture to achieve my goals and further develop my business.

How has your lifestyle changed since your business began to thrive?

The saying, ‘The reward for hard work is more work’, rings true for me. I’ve experienced significant improvements and now face a multitude of demands and obligations. I find myself constantly busy, transitioning from a frugal youth corps member to a bustling businesswoman.

Do you have any plans to remarry?

I’m currently focused on myself, my children, and my business; I’m living a fulfilling and peaceful life. Marriage isn’t a priority for me right now, but I trust in God’s plan for my future.

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