Many people experience negative feelings in life, in marriage these feelings can occur during different stages of the relationship regardless of the number of years a couple has been together. Feelings like anxiety, fear, loneliness, illness, and grief are some of the negative feelings of uncertainties couples often experience in marriage. The expectations you build in your marriage are often linked to your mental reasoning and when you or your spouse consistently engage in adverse thinking, they can have implications on your health and wellbeing as a couple.
Anxiety
A spouse who is constantly anxious about the situation in his/her marriage and the foreseeable future is more likely to miss out on the good aspects of the marriage if the brain has been conditioned to see only the negatives. This feeling can weaken the molecules in the brain that create a long-lasting feeling of happiness causing one to feel worried and nervous about common events. Anxiety can impact your ability to share your feelings with your spouse which can make it difficult to build a meaningful marital relationship.
Fear
In marriage, many other things will contest for your love and attention including the feeling of fear which can continually hang on to your past to create fear and believe that you cannot enjoy fulfilment in your marriage. Couples who come from unstable backgrounds are more likely to believe that the same pattern can manifest in their marriages in challenging situations. Even though this assumption is subjective, however, the feeling of fear is unhealthy and can be emotionally draining if left unguarded and can cause prolonged health issues.
Illness
One of the causes of grey divorce is personal circumstances such as illness which can suddenly tear marriage apart when a partner lacks the emotional capacity to become the caregiver. Marriage was not only created to enjoy the good times but in the bad times too, however, studies show that a man is more likely to leave or file for divorce when his wife is seriously ill while a woman is more likely to stay and care for her sick husband.
Loneliness
The origin of loneliness expressed in your marriage may not be isolated from issues such as abuse and neglect you may have experienced in your childhood or in your marital relationship which can become a self-gratifying situation. Feelings can be contagious and in as much as happiness triggers happiness; loneliness can also impact people around you, especially your spouse if you shut them out completely. Loneliness can also occur when there is a disconnection which can lead to hostility in the marriage, it can become a defense mechanism to protect the victim from an abusive partner.
Grief
One of the biggest fears of couples who have been happily married for decades and have become inseparable is the fear of losing one person to death and leaving the other behind. Even though death is inevitable, studies have shown that grief is considered the most intense feeling a person can experience after the death of a beloved spouse which can also create mixed feelings of guilt, anger, frustration, depression, anxiety, and solitude. While some grief and get back to living their normal lives others struggle to move on and grief can take a toll on your mental and physical health.
