Heartbreaking stories of men damaged by paternity fraud

Nigeria is faced with a growing storm as DNA paternity tests continue to uncover an alarming rate of deception. Once confined to whispers and suspicions, the shocking reality of paternity fraud is now tearing homes apart, with men discovering that the children they have loved and raised are not biologically theirs. Victor Ayeni writes that the ripple effects are devastating—emotional betrayals, broken identities, and families plunged into chaos as the spotlight is cast on issues of fidelity, secrecy, and the fragile nature of family bonds

In 2023, it felt like a jaw-dropping scene from a Nollywood blockbuster when Olanrewaju Kolawole received the paternity test results for his four children, who are products of his 16-year marriage to Toyin.

The 44-year-old collapsed, slipping into a seven-day coma after the DNA test revealed the unimaginable truth: he was not the biological father of any of his children.

The heart-wrenching revelation, shared on Agidigbo 88.7 FM in Ibadan, Oyo State, South-West Nigeria, sparked a media frenzy, sending shockwaves through the community.

While Toyin adamantly disputed the results, claiming she was not present when the samples were taken, Kolawole’s world had already spiralled into chaos.

His tale of betrayal and heartbreak rapidly went viral, captivating audiences across Nigeria and in the diaspora.

He said, “Within six or seven months, we started preparing for our wedding and we got married on September 8, 2007. The first child she gave birth to on October 29, 2007, was not from me.

“The second child was born on May 11, 2011, the third child on February 15, 2015, and the last child on March 21, 2018. As our relationship progressed, in 2020, we had a quarrel and I packed my things and left the house for her.

“Later, I returned home after reporting her to my mother, who advised me to go back. But on December 24, 2021, when I went to my shop, she packed her belongings and left the house without any problem between us.”

Kolawole said when he returned home and found out what had happened, he located where Toyin was and went to beg her to return, but she refused.

He continued, “The whole of 2022 passed, and by 2023, I planned to take back the children from her and take care of them myself. That was when I took the first child for a DNA test, and the result showed zero per cent, meaning I’m not his father.

“So I told her to take the first child and bring the other three children. When the results of the other three children came out, they were also not mine. At that point, I fainted and was unconscious for seven days.”

Responding to her husband’s accusation, Toyin told journalists in Ikire, that she resorted to sleeping with other men because Kolawole was not able to perform in bed.

She was quoted as saying, “Never you blame or curse me for what the DNA test brought out. My husband can’t perform at all, and I disguised this secret by meeting other men outside for us to have children.

“Let him or his family get him another woman and sleep with her, and confirm what I said.”

Paternity fraud

Paternity fraud has been described as “a widespread deception that misrepresents a child’s biological father,” having significant implications, “including emotional distress and financial burdens,” according to Fraud.com, a platform focused on sharing information and resources about fraud prevention.

Truth exposed by genotype

In a similar situation to Kolawole’s, a crypto enthusiast, Stephen Moses, in a series of posts on his X account (@SteveMosoes) in March 2024, while responding to a video of him in court with his wife, detailed how he discovered that his first child was not biologically his.

He disclosed that he got married on May 21, 2016, and his wife became pregnant and gave birth to a boy on November 8, 2018.

Moses said he discovered his son had a sickle cell genotype when the boy first experienced a health crisis, which led him to spend thousands of naira on hospital treatment.

He wrote, “At this point, I was confused. She first told me it was the enemy attacking us through the boy. I didn’t believe it, but I didn’t argue with her either. I started researching whether AA + AS could produce SS.”

“I found some rare cases of extreme weather conditions, but it wasn’t possible in Nigeria due to our stable weather. I spoke to a few counsellors and midwives at Ifako General Hospital and the Lagos State University Teaching Hospital.

“We kept living together, praying and fasting, but nothing changed. The boy kept having crises. By this point, we were already out of cash and couldn’t afford a DNA test, although I was uncomfortable, having confirmed from many sources that it was impossible.”

When Moses voiced his concerns to his friends about the genotypic disparity between himself, his wife, and the boy, one of his friends pointed him to the Justice Court, where DNA tests were conducted for free.

“So I contacted them and arranged a sample for myself and the boy for a paternity test. The results came out in December, and we had a court session where it was revealed, as seen in the video. The DNA results were negative. The need to clear herself arose, and she went into isolation.

“Since December, she has been avoiding calls from the Justice Court to carry out the judge’s verdict to run a maternity test. As I write this story, the Justice Court has not been able to reach her. She is not answering their calls,” he added.

Moses’ wife, while reacting in the video, said her husband’s story was true but disagreed with the results, adding that Moses did not discuss it with her before he went ahead to carry out the DNA test.

She said, “All that is said is true but when we were first diagnosed, why couldn’t he tell me that we should go for DNA? And meanwhile, he didn’t even come out straight that he wanted to do a DNA test.

“He started misbehaving in the house and sometimes he wouldn’t even come home until my brother said I should let him know whenever my husband was around.

“One he was around and my brother came and that was when he said what was happening because I didn’t know anything. So, he told me that his father dreamt that he was nursing another man’s child and that was the excuse he gave me that day and it went on like that.”

When asked who the father of the child was, the wife replied, “Nobody touched me. I’m very sure.”

Rise in negative paternity test figures

The latest report from a leading Lagos-based DNA testing centre, Smart DNA, revealed that nearly 27 per cent of paternity tests conducted by the centre returned negative results.

The 2024 report on DNA testing trends in Nigeria, which covered July 2023 to June 2024, indicated that more than one in four men tested within that time frame were not the biological fathers of the children in question.

The report also noted an increase in DNA tests immigration purposes, which are necessary for processing immigration paperwork for children.

The report revealed a divide between tests conducted on the mainland, comprising 67.5 per cent, and those on the Island, making up 32.5 per cent.

Regarding gender dynamics in test initiation, men requested 88.2 per cent of all tests, compared to 11.8 per cent initiated by women.

An ethnic breakdown showed that the Yoruba accounted for 53 per cent of the tests, while the Igbo made up 31.3 per cent, and the Hausa only 1.2 per cent.

The report further revealed that 85.9 per cent of tests were conducted for personal reassurance rather than legal reasons.

Saturday PUNCH gathered that paternity fraud has gained significant attention as DNA testing has become more accessible, leading to a troubling trend of mistrust, legal disputes, and bitter conflicts between couples, with a notable percentage of tests revealing negative results.

Highlighting the accuracy of DNA tests, a biotechnologist, Benson Okorie, said,“Medical research has established that DNA tests are real, and their accuracy is 99.9 per cent. Most tests use cheek swabs or blood samples to collect genetic material, usually from the potential father.

“When the samples are collected in the lab, we look for genetic markers, which are characteristics in the DNA sequences that the child shares with the person who gave birth to them and the potential non-birthing parent. Nowadays, there is greater awareness and more access to DNA test kits than before.”

Okorie added that there are different types of DNA tests which involve human DNA profile, paternity, maternity, sibling matching, and avuncular etc.

“In Nigeria, and the world at large, the most common test is the DNA paternity, this test involves both the alleged father and the child. During the test, it’s expected that the total match of the analysed Short Tandem Repeates loci should be 99.99 per cent with this you can conclude if the alleged father is the biological father of a child.

“However, rare cases of having one mismatch can be a result of mutation, thereby a further investigation or test can be suggested,” he added.

Netizens react

Reacting to the report by Smart DNA, several netizens on social media decried the trend of paternity fraud, blaming it on sexual promiscuity and deceit.

An X user, Frederick Omondiale, wrote, “This is a worrying trend. The truth is that we have been a nation of subdued, festering promiscuity of the vilest form! A nation where married women quietly sleep around, get pregnant, and maliciously pass these kids off as their husbands’ children! But for DNA tests, women can be wicked.”

Highlighting the 27 per cent of negative paternity test results cited in the report, another X user, Isaac Obasi, wrote, “This statistic indicates that more than one in four men tested are not the biological fathers of the children in question.

“The figure highlights significant issues around paternity and trust within relationships, sparking discussions about the importance of transparency and the potential social implications of such findings.”

“Most, if not all, men say it is natural for them to cheat, and they publicly boast about their girlfriends, so I see no reason why they should have issues with fathering each other’s children. They are probably dating each other’s wives. It’s brotherhood, love, helping other men out,” Hamelvie wrote on X.

Debunking the notion that an ethnic group has more negative paternity tests or a greater degree of sexual recklessness, Wale Ayoola wrote, “The report only talked about the demography of Nigerians who took the test; it didn’t clarify where the negative results mostly came from. There’s nowhere that is free from sexual recklessness in Nigeria.”

A Facebook user, Rita Ndomi, also wrote, “Women sometimes commit paternity fraud due to the infertility of their husbands, and there are times when they resort to extramarital affairs with other men due to financial pressures. But these figures show that women cheat as much as men in marriage.”

 

‘Lawmakers should make tests compulsory’

In April, the President of a non-profit organisation, One Love Foundation, Patrick Eholor, asked the National Assembly to pass a law making paternity tests compulsory after childbirth to ensure fidelity among couples.

He stated, “I have also been a victim of this issue. You can imagine a child you have raised for more than two decades, and then you do a paternity test because you are taking the children abroad, and you come up with the shock that the children do not belong to you. You know how tormenting that could be. It is traumatising and heartbreaking.

“I am saying that Nigerian women and men should support a bill I am about to propose to the National Assembly that would compel our Nigerian women to take a DNA test before a man can accept a child. It is of benefit to the woman, the man, and the child.”

A legal practitioner and public interest advocate, Idam Maduabuchi, explained that the Matrimonial Causes Act and the Matrimonial Causes Rules, which are the leading legal frameworks for matrimonial causes in Nigeria, fail to make provisions for paternity fraud.

He said, “Whether this was an innocent omission or a deliberate exclusion borne out of the genuine desire not to rock the ‘sacred’ institution of marriage remains doubtful. Similarly, the Criminal Code is also silent on the issue.

“Nevertheless, sections 387 and 388 of the Penal Code Act provide for imprisonment for two years and/or with a fine for adultery. But the law also remains silent on the issue of ‘having a child outside wedlock and deceitfully or fraudulently leading a spouse to believe that such a child was his.’

“The Court of Equity does not make a practice of suffering a wrong without a remedy. Therefore, it is my considered view that whereas the criminal laws in Nigeria do not consider paternity fraud an offence, victims reserve the right to seek damages under civil law.”

Maduabuchi further stated that a partner misled into believing that he owned the paternity of a child, and who relied on such an impression to train and raise the child, “may recover as damages in a civil court, every financial loss and psychological pain incurred as a result of such deceit.”

 

Religious leaders weigh in

In an interview with Saturday PUNCH, Pastor Daniel Okunoye of Multiply Christian Network described paternity fraud as a sin and one of the consequences of men’s sexual indiscretions.

Okunoye stated, “It’s a horrendous and selfish sin that men and women must oppose. Unfortunately, men have prided themselves in cheating on their wives for many years, and with what we are witnessing nowadays, it’s clear that women too are actively cheating just like men.

“The onus lies on men. If every man out there refuses to cheat on his wife or sleep with another man’s wife, there would be no men available for women to cheat with. So, we all should return to God, follow His ways, and renounce adultery and fornication.”

Also speaking with our correspondent, a Muslim cleric, Qoyum Akindele, said, “Islam seriously frowns on fornication and adultery. Although the use of DNA tests is not mentioned in Islam, it can be used to prove the paternity of a child. However, other techniques could also be utilised.

“For instance, Islamic law has put in place a principle called Al-walad lil firash, which means the child is to be attributed to the one on whose bed it is born, i.e. the husband. In a situation where a DNA test conflicts with the ruling of Islamic law, the ruling is applied.”

However, an Osogbo-based Ifa Priest, Chief Ifayemi Elebuibon, who spoke to journalists in May, said, “The Yoruba have traditional DNA methods, and they are very potent. They vary from one family or compound to another. We are experiencing a high rate of paternity fraud cases now because our race has decided to abandon what belongs to us and embrace two foreign religions.

“In Yoruba culture, even during childbirth, the paternity of a baby can be determined. In my compound in those days, a new wife would take an oath before the Ogun shrine to remain faithful to only her husband.

“Traditionally, there are several ways we can determine the paternity of a child. These means are cheap and safe, but our people are not interested in them. They are an alternative available for those interested.”